La la la~

I had internet problems last week and it was driving me crazy because it was hard for me to even attach my assignments and send them to my group members through emails. Plus, the internet is my leisure life when I'm at home. Mr. Next Door wasn't very helpful for the past few days until I threatened to stop paying for the internet and phone bill altogether. Come on, he didn't even looked like he was putting effort in TRYING to see what's wrong! As if taking a look at my laptop would equal to cheating on his girlfriend -_-" I asked him to touch my computer, not my body lah.

Tried to threaten to move out. Over a couple of bills? Do the math, mister. And see if it's worth it. Never in a million years would I try to kick you out of my place, nor would I want for things to turn this ugly. But since you've drawn such a clear cut line to show that we're nothing more than housemates and nothing close to being friends these days, do you really think I'll give a f''kin shit? I cared and tried to be nice, and you practically threw it right back at my face.

I know I stupidly look like a pushover at times, but no one threatens me and actually gets away with it?! Besides my parents, that is. I still need them to partially support me after all hehe :P One of my weaknesses is that I might be slightly irrational when I'm pissed so I just might do things to 'get the message across'. Even if I would regret it later, I'll want you to 'die' with me first for trying to be a real smart ass.

Anyway, besides these unwanted drama, life has been pretty good. I've been happy. ^^ Just spending time with people that care for me. Juggling my time to fit them, uni and work on a daily basis.

Finally (for once) I'm no longer obsessing and getting upset about my ex anymore (except for the Internet issue on Monday). I no longer want to care about us no longer talking or see each other for days despite living under the same roof. No longer miss or think about what went wrong. No longer cry about how everything can turn out to be like this. No longer doing the things that I'm too ashamed to mention here.

Especially after this Internet incident and how he reacted about it, it gave me that wake-up call that I needed and opened my eyes real wide. Despite 3 years of relationship, and the 5 years of friendship prior to that, I'm not worth keeping even as a friend. I'm not sure if he saw or remembered the sacrifices and what I went through for him, but it sure shows that it no longer matters or was even appreciated before. Can't say I didn't try to give 'us' another try last year. And I made plenty of attempts to keep things friendly, hoping to mend our friendship up til now.


So child, why do you cry or feel the slightest remorse for such a person? No reason to!

Now, I'm out with people who wants to see me. Care for me. Talk to me. And put a smile on my face, instead of a tear. This is what that matters. <3